My husband an I will be married 10 years this fall, and I think we're ready for some new vows.
We've pretty much mastered for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all othters. Instead of repeating those vows and recommitting to what we've already accomplished, I want us to make some new promises for this stage of our relationship.

 

Here are a few:

 

I will trim my nose hair as often as necessary.

 

I will not pick my nose or scratch my butt in public.

 

I won't bite my nails if you don't pick your toes.

 

I won't mention your belly if you don't mention my gray hair.

 

I will share the blanket.

 

It's true--after more than a decade together, some of our physical habits have become annoying. It's hard for me to remember, but there was a time actually lulled me to sleep, rather than keeping me awake.

 

It isn't just physical habits that can grate on each other's nerves now. Our verbal habits can also be frustrating. For example, my husband is a very funny man. Except when he's not.

 

So, some additional vows:

 

I will only tell jokes I know are funny.

 

If you stop talking to me while I'm reading, I'll stop talking to you while you're watching "Iron Chef."

 

I promise to interrupt you while you're speaking only in case of an actual emergency (which includes wanting to know where you've put the chocolate).

 

I won't sing a song unless I know all the words.

 

I'll try to limit conversations that involve yelling from room to room, except when I'm in the bathroom and need more toilet paper, or when I'm in the bedroom and wonder what's for dinner, or when I'm in th TV room and you're playing computer games.

 

As we enter our second decade of marriage, we'll both be in our 40s, instead of our 30s. Some of our chaming idiosyncrasies now look more like character flaws. We've both changed, but not necessarily in the ways either of us might have imagined or hoped.

 

At the same time, there are agreements we've tacitly made, without explicitly acknowledging them. They include:

 

I will say "I was wrong, you were right."

 

I will remind you regularly why you married me and why I married you.

 

I will keep it together when you're falling apart and only fall apart when you're able to hold things together.

 

As we grow older, we hope to mature faster than we age. We learn to love, honor and cherish ourselves. And we try to have and hold onto money better.

 

As our marriages age, it becomes harder than ever to forsake all other destractions(kids, work, the Internet) and pay attention to our partners, who we expect to see beside us on the other side of the bed, the other side of the table, the other side of our lives. They are our mirrors, but they are not us.

 

So, in the next phase of our lives, I will look beyond the flaws and the imperfections and the inadequacies we all feel and celebrate the life my husband and I have created and the love we enjon.

 

Till death to us part.

 

到今年秋天, 我和丈夫就结婚满十周年了.我想我们都准备好了做出新的誓言。

 

无论富裕贫穷，无论疾病安康，都不离不弃。关于这点，我们已经做得蛮不错的了。我不想再重复这些誓言，或承诺做一些我们已经做到的事情。相反，我们的婚姻走到了目前的这一阶段，我希望做出一些新的承诺。

 

例如以下这些：

 

我会按需要经常修剪鼻毛。我不会在公共场合挖鼻孔或者挠屁股。

 

你不剔趾甲，我就不咬手指甲。

 

只要你不说我的白发，我就不提你的肚腩。、

 

我会和你分享毛毯。

 

这可是真心话--在共处了十年以后，我们的一些生活习惯已经变得令人讨厌了。我现在也记不清了，但是曾经有段时间，我觉得丈夫的鼾声很可爱。那时候他的鼾声并没有吵得我无法睡觉，反而能让我安然入睡。

 

现在不仅仅是我们的一些生活习惯会让对方发狂，我们说话的习惯也会很恼人。譬如说，丈夫是一个非常风趣的人，在他言辞乏味的时候除外。

 

所以，我的誓言还要加上这几条：

 

我只会讲自己确定好笑的笑话。

 

如果你在我看书的时候，能不跟我说话、打扰我，我就不会在你看《铁厨师》的时候跟你说话。我发誓只在十万火急的情况下才打断你的话（包括想知道你把巧克力放哪里了）。

 

我绝不会唱歌，除非我能把歌词记全。

 

我会绝不隔着房间喊话，除非我在洗手间又需要卫生纸，或者我在卧室里又想知道晚餐吃什么，又或者是我在电视房而你在玩电脑游戏。

 

当我们步入婚姻的第二个十年的时候，我们俩也都告别而立，进入不惑之年了。我们有些曾经很讨人喜欢的个性，现在却成了缺点。我们都变了，但并未必是朝着我们想象或者希望的方向改变。

 

与此同时，我们多了些心照不宣的默契，尽管彼此都没有言明，这些默契包括：

 

我会说："我错了，你是对的。"

 

我会常常提醒你当初为什么娶了我，而我又为什么嫁给了你。

 

在你崩溃的时候我会尽力支撑大局，只有在你能支撑大局的时候，我才会崩溃。

 

随着年岁的增长，我们希望能够快点成熟，比我们实际年龄的增长还要快。我们学着去爱自己、尊重自己，和珍惜自己。我们也尝试着攒钱和更合理地花钱。

 

随着婚姻的成长，我们更难摆脱让我们分心的事情（孩子、工作，和互联网），来专注于我们的伴侣。我们习惯了感觉到对方躺在床的另一边，看见对方坐在餐桌旁的另一端，习惯了对方是我们生活的另一半。他们是我们的镜子，但却不是我们。

 

那么，在我们婚姻生活的这个新阶段，我会超越生活中的缺点，瑕疵和不足，来赞颂自己和丈夫一同创造的生活和我们之间的爱。

 

不离不弃，至死不渝。